Walking With Trees

My children.....I completely adore them. I try to teach them right from wrong based on my very basic understanding of the concept. I try to look out for them, while letting them make, and be responsible for their own choices. I am not a perfect Mama. Very far from it. I have eccentricities, issues, and hang-ups that affect my children every day. My battle with anxiety is on-going, and I know they pay the price sometimes. But I (and my husband) have continually tried to teach them that God's love knows no bounds. That race is not an issue in our house. That the color of your skin should have no bearing on who you are. I had actually not had any "in your face" racism to deal with when it came to my children, until we moved to Tennessee. I mean, it was there.....I heard it, to a degree.......but mostly ignored it. I mean, how could it affect me, right? I am a (sorta) middle class white woman who is fairly open-minded. Maybe I should have examined that part of myself further. Maybe I will. But now, this has to do with my children. I came of age in Alabama....so why is this crap surprising me??? But it is. And it is making me very, very angry. Recently we went to pick one child up at a friend's house. My husband gets out of the car to get that child. Uncle of child's friend asks my husband if he was in the military. My husband says he was. Uncle of child's friend proceeds to tell my husband that he was injured while in the military because "some n----- wasn't paying attention to his job." This man has NEVER met us before. Hasn't even seen me. Doesn't know my race. Says this IN FRONT of my child! My husband came back to the car bewildered. We reiterated to our children that that kind of talk was NOT acceptable....but I felt upset none-the-less. Why would this man assume we would ever agree with him, or think that was an appropriate way to speak in front of someone he had just met? My guess is.....this dude talks like that all of the time, and it means absolutely nothing to him. Then the other night, one of my children's friends tells me that his/her parents told them that dating outside of one's race was against God! Arrgghh!!!!! What an ugly, short-sided way to use God to support your own prejudices! So now, I am helping one of my children unravel the feelings of fright about God's wrath and find answers to some very tough questions. I also know that my middle-schooler has heard things at school that have upset her. You don't have to like our president....but PLEASE keep your racist comments to yourself....'cause your children are going to repeat them at school! My grade-schooler has heard things on her bus as well....oh...AND heard some children saying some pretty bad things at school when Obama did his speech for school children last year. But....while they have a right to believe and teach their chikdren whatever they feel is right, I have a right to disagree AND demand my children not have to be privy to it at school. I guess as far as friends go...I have to just be there for them. I don't feel like keeping them away from friends whose parents I disagree with is the right answer. This is so tricky. And it is such a broad topic. Religion, race, politics......heavy stuff for such young people. But this is the world we live in. I love it and I love our country. SO I guess I will just focus on my own 3 precious children. My gifts..............(given to me). Every once in a while, the awesomeness of responsibility in raising children just brings me to my knees. I guess that's not such a bad place to fall.